Saturday, November 6, 2010

Ten Reasons Why Pregnancy Sucks...

Have I ever said that pregnancy sucks? Well, I should have because it does. Oh, sure, there are the great parts…the whole life force thing, yada, yada, yada. But who wants to talk about that? Here are some reasons why it just sucks.

1. Can’t sleep on my tummy.

2. Can’t sleep at all.

3. Have to pee all too often.

4. Have this urge to scream at people—both people I know and others I’ve never met, like certain cashiers at certain stores. Sometimes I feel like I’m on a war path. Watch out.

5. Can’t bend. Yes. Already. It sucks to bend over. And do you all know how often a person bends down in a day? Just keep a record for one day and you’ll be surprised. We are always bending. Except now I’m doing this weird squat sort of thing where I have to pull up my pants before I start to lower myself to the ground. Honestly, it takes wayyy too much energy, and I find myself just staring at the object I need or want and then making a plea for someone else to get it for me when I see them walk past. Pathetic.

6. Pregnancy brain. At least that’s what I call it. Did you know your brain actually shrinks when you are pregnant? Yep. It’s a scientific fact! So showing up two hours early for a class at the gym and forgetting about my daughter’s field trip until she reminds me twenty minutes before school??? It’s all part of the package.

7. Strange eating habits. I can’t seem to say no to anything. Not the popcorn at the theater or the cake mix in my pantry. And it’s not just junk food. I went to Costco with Brad yesterday and bought a whole thing of raspberries. And I ate them. One by one.

8. Absolutely no patience.

9. Hot flashes. Brad told me last night he was cold. Seriously? It was 69 freakin degrees in the house! I had to open the window next to the couch to get some air while I read my book.

10. This is the last one. For now. NO DRUGS. I’ve had this annoying cough for the better part of the week and last night it turned into a sore throat. Ugh. I HATE sore throats. Normally when I’m sick I inhale twice the legal amount of Nightquil, give myself a good buzz, and wait it out—without feeling very much of anything, mind you. But not last night. At 2:30 in the morning, I was up googling how to take care of a sore throat without drugs. I tried gargling saltwater and ended up throwing up in my kitchen sink. It was very miserable.

So there you have it. Ten reasons why pregnancy sucks. This morning I am sipping a hot lemon/honey drink and my throat is feeling better. As for everything else? It’s probably best just to stay out of my way for the next few months. Well…unless, I need you to pick something up for me. ;)


  1. Black Licorice and honey; either separately or mixed together in hot water. Sip it very slowly. Also, rootbeer, best if it is flat and warm; sip, don't guzzle.

  2. Don't forget the swollen feet! Yes pregnancy does suck most of the time!!! love the entry, you are too funny :)

  3. I once wrote a post like this too. I think it was towards the end of preg #3. Oh sweetie I'm sorry for those bad days when everything is harder than normal. Let me know if you need anything!